Liar Liar Pants on Fire

The flames of fear, the lies they tell, and how we let it rage out of control

What are you afraid of?

Not everyone is ready to share the things that shake their souls, and we hide behind the forced smile on our faces.

We all fear something.

The big things like pain, death, and abandonment. Yeah, those three are in the top tier of fear.

Fear, in the right circumstances, is not only good but essential.

Way back in our human history, fear served a practical purpose. It kept us alive when we openly lived among the world's wild creatures. We're here today because our ancestors from countless generations ago listened to justified fear and kept themselves alive.

Over time, we mastered our environment and rose to the top of the food chain.

But, our being...the essence of who we are...still has fear deeply rooted within us.

And it needs an outlet now that most of us no longer rely on our hunting, gathering, and living off-the-land skills.

So, our brains, being amazing creations we struggle to understand, find ways to keep them fed and in shape in case of emergency.

Thought patterns get stuck in our minds as we weave "what if?" tales to stoke fear's embers and prepare us for the inevitable worst.

"What if I never find love?"

"What if I'm broken?"

"What if I never lose this weight?"

"What if I make a mistake with my kids? My spouse? My job?"

"What if my goal is too hard?"

"What if my book/writing sucks?"

"What if people figure out I know damn idea what I'm doing?"

Just a few of the burning coals are blowing smoke in my brain.

And maybe some of those thoughts aren't lies, as the pictured quote says.

I know I've made lots of mistakes with my kids. And my spouse. You can ask them! Although I doubt they'd make a big deal out of it.

My writing sometimes sucks BIG TIME. Why? It's part of the process. It's because I don't do it as much as I want to or should. Why? Because my words might suck. Talk about an endless loop!

And even though I know I only get better when I sit my ass in this chair and get the words out, I avoid it because fear tells me it's safe to stay in silence.

I give those thoughts and fears oxygen. We all know what happens when we add oxygen to a fire. It quickly gets out of control.

That's where I've been stuck for the past 18 months.

Also, I'm afraid of returning to the person I was before I started my health journey.

Maybe this is the one area where fear could help me. I can use it constructively instead of allowing it to lie to me.

Instead of being pushed into hiding by the fear of all the things that could happen, all the ways I can fail.

We fail in our unwillingness to take action in the face of fear. That’s where its power grows.

I will work on controlling and letting those flames create a path to slow, deliberate progress. Sure, I may get burned a bit along the way. But better than letting it engulf me by allowing it to control me.